I have discovered something horrifying about my creative well. If I am not actively writing something fictional, I struggle with writing in all forms. Now, first let me back up by saying that my novel, the one that I’ve been querying, has called dibs on all of my writing TIME (which is different than writing energy, but that’s for another post). This tyrant-of-a-novel will not let me work on another project. That being said however, as of early this year I voluntarily took a break from it and all writing projects other than blog posts because I felt in need of a breather and refreshed outlook on life, and the writing within.
That’s when I figured I could play catch-up in other writing venues. Continue to build relationships in blogosphere, learn more about networking/social media, find some good writing sites for advice, read a good book on writing, give my muse some well-deserved rest.
But, I ran into a problem. I’m not into writing about writing when I’m not writing a story. I mean, I rarely post detailed specifics about my WIP because I don’t like to show my hand that much. However, I love to jib-jab about the process and analyze from different angles. Without a project at hand, though, I feel like an imposter, haha. Which, to all of my lovely, dedicated followers, I’m sure that’s not how you see it—but that’s how it feels to me. Like, can you be a farmer even if you don’t have a crop in the ground? Eep, maybe that’s too philosophical and straying off point…
I guess the issue is more that I have no oomph to write anything at all—not even a blog post. Even the comments I have been making on fellow bloggers’ posts are lukewarm. I’ve even struggled over writing this one, to be perfectly honest.
At first I told myself it is because I’m burned out from all sides. The school year is still going strong. Spring sports have begun, so we have had to double-up on after-school activities a few times a week. Allergies, the godforsaken seasonal allergies, have flattened us at home. I think even the dog is suffering from the pollen. It doesn’t help that we have had no rain this month. Whatever happened to ‘April showers’? I am running two creative writing programs at two different schools (freelance job), editing a novel (another freelance job), fighting with health insurance companies over some medical billing (the other freelance job). Then I have recess duty/substitute teaching which I kinda-sorta fell into without realizing what I’m doing and although I like it, it’s just yet another responsibility (okay, yes, it has turned into a freelance job).
Then I told myself—you’re no different than any other working mother on this planet. Get a grip. Figure things out. You can do this. Make a list. Make four! Devise a schedule. Stick to it. Drink more coffee. Give the kids more chores. Try not to hover over them while they’re dusting, or scrubbing the toilet, or cleaning up dog poops. Use your crock-pot more often. Don’t cook. Plan ahead. Be prepared to detour from that plan. Tear up those lists and make seven new ones. Ditch the coffee and grab an IPA. So what if my kids can’t really clean the windows, at least it’s kind of getting done.
Then I remembered that I have always been this busy. And that the only difference is that, in the past, I have been actively writing a story. Whether it be my novel that I query, revise, query, revise, query, revise…I have also been entrenched in short stories, NaNoWriMo, the sequel to my novel, etc. In other words, when things in my real life are too hectic, I have always been able to escape into a nether world. That’s where I let loose. That is where I can let my guard down and deal with somebody else’s problems for a while.
I really wonder if because I haven’t been working/playing with my own cast of characters and my own imaginary world if I have let my muse wither away. If perhaps writing isn’t just my passion that keeps me riveted, but it also imbues me with a sense of calm and control. When I’m putting my imagination to work, I am a much happier, relaxed, fulfilled person all around.
So, I guess I just want to say to everyone out there if it seemed like 4am wasn’t really with it the past few months, this might be the reason why. Maybe, if I can get some things under better control I can start writing again. Real writing, at least, what I call real writing. Where you get to make things up.
I’m with you on this. I generally write at night so I won’t be interrupted. I like the idea that I can just write and write if I want and there’s nothing but sunrise to stop me. My other half is in a frump at the moment (she’s a frustrated writer too). She asks me all the time: ‘Why am I in such a gloom?’ My answer is always the same – ‘You’re not writing.’ Creativity is a necessity for humans, I’m convinced. We have to be creating in some way or another or we feel disconnected in some way, unfulfilled, discontent. When I feel down, I just go and create. I feel better instantly.
Hi Stuart,
That’s a wonderful way to put it all into perspective: “Creativity is a necessity for humans” and I have to believe it. Of course, creativity comes in many forms, not just writing, and we are all creative in one way or another. The ones who know what makes their souls sing are the lucky ones (writing for us), and it is a shame that I have been neglecting it for this long. No wonder I’m in such a funk.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
That’s it – there are an infinite ways to be creative. When I feel the need to paint – I paint. If I feel the need to make music I go to my piano. Sometimes I draw. Others do gardening, or crochet or fix things etc. etc. I write in my book about how one should ‘find’ their creativity, then indulge in it, whatever it is.
And there is always that population that shies away from the term ‘creativity’. As if it is a weakness, when in fact–as we’ve just discussed–it’s a strength.
Don’t be so hard on yourself, Kate. You are querying a novel right now. Do you think the slump could be because you are waiting to hear from queries? Don’t worry but do write
Just curious…does your writing/blog schedules change with summer vacation?
Hi Christy,
I think the ultimate slump is that I chose not to write while I query. What I should be doing is, as you say, write something else. I’m having a difficult time transitioning, though.
Yes, summer vacation actually means less time to write. I will still have my 4-6am window, and if I can get my act together, will start a new writing project to work on during that time frame. As for the rest of the day/night–I doubt I’ll have any writing time.
I’ll figure something out. Thanks for the pep talk!
Even if you don’t have a firm idea of a project, stick to your schedule and write whatever pops into your head. As long as you’re not filling reams of paper with, “All work and no play make Jack a dull boy.” ;p So what if day to day they don’t form a cohesive story. They’ll be bits of stories. Scenes, characters, dialogue — whatever. Exercise your muse! Eventually, like well cooked pasta to the wall, something will stick.
You’re right, of course. Writing anything is better than writing nothing. Thanks for commenting!
Don’t forget you’ve just finished a novel and you’re querying it, that’s a huge achievement and your brian probably needs a little break from that before you jump into a new project. I agree though writing keeps us sane, you’ll get back into it soon I know. and hey, this post was great so your muse is still very much here
Hi Victoria,
lol, well, good I’m glad the post was readable/enjoyable. I guess something is still clicking. And yes, I need to just relax about it, and things will fall into place. Thanks for commenting!
We are similar souls. Whenever I am working on a project (whether its writing or theatre) that I feel excited about, I seem to be able to juggle more and more balls with skill and flare. While I am excited about my WIPs, they are still in the beginning stages, and I still feel like an imposter when it comes to writing, so self doubt creeps in not allowing me to simply go with the creative flow. (Sorry for the multiple mixed metaphors here). I am trying to make a schedule, make a plan, and write even if whatever comes out is garbage. When I can do that, time flies and I get more done. It’s the mystery of the universe.
Hey Lisa,
It’s strange, isn’t it, how the creative spirit works. It just constantly needs to be tended to–but in an enjoyable way. I think if we feel forced that’s when we get ourselves into trouble.
Thanks for commenting.
I have to be honest. There’s a reason I’ve been known to refer to writing as my prozac. It helps me deal with everything else and be okay with myself. I know what happens if I stop working on it in some way, and trust me, not pretty. I know that isn’t the case for all people, but what you said near the end made me think of that.
That doesn’t mean that I have to be writing draft all of the time. My brain might explode if I tried that. But I always have a project in mind, I’m always making notes, editing, working toward something with my writing in general.
I’m sure you’ll find that place you need to be at soon though.
Hi Julie,
Ah yes, writing is the artist’s over-the-counter Prozac. Haha. That’s true for me, I’m realizing more and more. For a long time I wrote to write because it was fun and I enjoyed it. Now I’m understanding how deeply it runs through me.
Thanks for commenting.
Kathryn, i agree with all your commenters. The time between writing can be so unsettling that it’s unbearable. A writer was saying that writing is the constant in her life, the 1 thing she turns to no matter–and sometimes because of–the chaos.
Hi Kathryn, absolutely. Unbearable is the perfect word. I need to get back to it, don’t I. Thanks for commenting.
For me, when I get in the writing zone, it’s like meditation. My mind empties of everything but the story and I am seeing it all unfold in my mind as I type. It’s a necessary activity to balance me out.
Hi Kourtney, I’m like that, too. I can block out the world when I’m writing (unless the world is banging down my door demanding dinner
). It is that space of calm control that I miss the most. A place for me to go when everything else is falling apart. And then the other side (life) doesn’t seem so bad after all. Balance.
I had to meditate daily when I wasn’t writing (during last summer’s travels). But I came home dying to get back to it. It made me realize how much I love to write. That I choose it everyday.
Sometimes you have to not do something to realize how much it matters to your existence. 
Great point, Kourtney. Once you’re without, you can feel the difference in your life. That’s true for anything nourishing.
“And this too shall pass.”
Haha, yes, Dennis, how right you are. It must if we are to move forward.
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I know how you feel. I’m also querying agents and can’t seem to get back into the flow of really writing fiction for now (not even a short story) even though I love it. Maybe the possibility of rejection isn’t best for creativity. Maybe we use different parts of the brain for querying and writing fiction. There’s really no excuse, though. We’ve just got to do it and get caught up in it again. Thank you for the reminder!
Hi Sheila,
I think you’re onto something here. Rejection probably isn’t very nourishing for creativity and could explain greatly why you and I are in these funks. Our creative selves are being clobbered with every rejection–how could they be spurred to produce? Hmm. Yup, I don’t see any other way around it either. We simply must tune back into the writing and do it. You’re welcome for the reminder, and I thank you for a very astute point!
Using your farming analogy, I think, yes, you are a farmer if you don’t have anything planted. For traditional farmers, once the harvest is over and winter sets in, time is spent on other chores in preparation for the next planting season.
So, you’ve harvested your crop (finished the novel), winter has set in (the query process), and you’re working on some other chores (that pesky thing called “real” life).
It sounds like you’re ready for spring and the next round of planting (starting another work of fiction). And this post may be your Muse’s way to get your attention.
Hi JM, I love how you took the analogy one step further. Thanks! That actually helps put a lot into perspective. I’m in a state of inactivity/noncreativity and so I’m not producing.
This of course means that I’m going to have to re-evaluate my daily schedule. The idea of starting another project is both exciting and scary. Where in the world am I going to fit that in!
Well, first things first. I must tie up those loose ends in my current WIP. Then maybe I’ll feel a little bit more like wanting to write something big and new. Thanks for your helpful comment.
I hear you! Since I’ve put my story on hold, I’ve been lukewarm too. Agh! I wish there were more time. Maybe I need to get up at 4AM like you…but then I’d have to go to bed earlier than 11:30, and I don’t really want to do that. Oh, the pressure!
Choices, choices! What are you doing until 11:30 that’s more important than your writing?
Oh, I’m usually writing until then. That’s when it’s quiet and I can focus.
Aaargh. Even when we carve out the time it isn’t enough. But good for you for even finding the time, Char. Some writers struggle even with that.
Hi Char, it’s a battle isn’t it. Haha, I don’t know if 4am is for everyone. Even I think I’m cuckoo for my 4am block of time, but then again, it is the only block of me-time.
I guess you and I both need to get our butts into gear and start writing, something, anything! After all of these wonderful comments I feel there is no choice but to get back to writing something that really matters to me. Thanks for raising your hand and saying, ‘me too!’. I like the company.
Whew! And I thought I was busy. But I agree with what many have said. Writing helps keep me sane, I try to make a little time for it every day. (Of course, I have yet to really be between projects.) This is a good post – see all the discussion it’s sparked.
Hi Carol,
Yeah, right now I lead a crazy-but fulfilling-life. I need to shift some things around and make sure my 4am block is about writing, and writing only. I have let it slide and it is up to me to get things back on track. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
It’s so hard to carve out that writing time, isn’t it? I feel guilty, because now I DO have time — I’m retired — but I can’t just turn on the creativity when I want it to be there, and I’m focused on other things right now, so it feels like I’m constantly putting my novel on the back burner… probably because I am, LOL!
Yes, but you just came off a really big promotion for your latest novel, Nancy!! You deserve a little time to kick back and regroup. I think once you replenish your stores, you’ll feel the old writing urge again
Firstly I think all your recent comments are showing your usual high level of insight and compassion so even if you don’t feel quite as energetic on in the blogging world as you have been, you can’t switch off you are!
Secondly I just say go easy on yourself. You do what you need to, to feel happy, whether that’s launching into a new writing project that makes you feel excited, or just giving yourself a bit of a break for a while and perhaps focusing on other aspects of your life. You’ve put so much into writing your novel that’s it’s not surprising you might need a bit of a wind-down for a while, particularly as you’re waiting to find out if a publisher wants to take it forward, in which case there will be inevitable edits – you have that need to write within you, so you will get back to it and as soon as you focus yourself on a new novel you’ll get right back into that positive circle of creativity! x
Hi Sally, yes, I do remind myself that it isn’t like I’ve been lazy or anything like that. My body/mind are telling me something, and perhaps it is to slow down for a bit. With summer vacation around the corner I have to reconfigure my daily schedule anyway. So, this is actually a good time to be in flux, I have the flexibility to go in pretty much any direction. Sometimes the universe is sneakier than we realize
Thanks for stopping by!
If you don’t think your past posts are up to par, then I’m really excited to see what you give us in the future! I so enjoy your writing, the blog and your fiction. The life of a writer is definitely not an easy path, but that’s what makes it so great. Keep fighting the good fight
Aww, Ames, you’re sweet to say that. Thank you. Sometimes I get down on myself and forget how much I really am capable of. After reading all of these comments I realize that I’m doing the best that I can and I’ve still got my head above the water. That’s pretty good considering. Thanks!
I understand. I haven’t written in so long I was sure I couldn’t. Today I was given a challenge and what do you know…the words fell out and now I cant stop them. It happens when it happens.
Hey Kate,
Aren’t challenges wonderful? Do you participate in Julia’s 100 Word Challenges? I do it via Limebird and I was amazed at what I was able to pull off with having virtually no story idea to go by. Those are great at reinforcing my creative spirit. But the time has definitely come when I need to do more than just 100 words each week in disconnected pieces. And you’re right, it happens when it happens. I think I’m on my way! Thanks for stopping by!
Love this! Thank you … I can surely relate. I am enjoying your blog. I think the best we can do is stay light, look up, (yes, and make 3, 4, 5 lists!
, remember to breathe and the words will and do come when they are ready!
Hello! Great to have you stop by! I find that lists keep me sane, even if I don’t abide by them to the letter. Just knowing I have things written down somewhere is helpful.
You are absolutely right–the words will come, and stress only blocks them further. Breathing is always a good recommendation
Thanks so much for commenting.
Sorry Four, I’m new to the group so you seem just fine to me, COACH IMPOSTER, HAHAHA. I’m kidding.
I don’t expect you to be 100% all of the time and from my perspective I imagine your 100%, in regards to being a writer, would look like 150%-200%. I think you’ve been pretty great, but hey, don’t let me get in the way if you want to give yourself a little spanking. Alright so you’ve punished yourself and came up with a solution to your problem. So go write me some more fiction COACH. Show me how it’s done. I have my note pad in hand. All of my note taking can’t be on The Treasure you know.
Hey Brian,
Point taken. Yes. I can’t be 100% all the time, and going easy on myself is necessary in times like this.
I’m really glad I wrote this post, because you all have bombarded me with support and encouragement. Now I feel like I’ve been refeuled in a way. My creative space (mentally) feels much more ready to do battle once again!
Thanks!
Anytime Coach!
Ra Ra Sis Boom Ba!
Hi honey
I’ve nominated you for The Creative Chaos Award!
Please don’t feel obligated to take part, but if you would like to, the details are here…..
http://the-view-outside.com/2012/04/29/two-more-awards/
Xx
Hi Vikki,
Thank you very much. I’m fairly certain ‘chaos’ is my middle name, so this sounds like a suitable award. I will check it out! Have a loverly day.
youre welcome hon
Yeah, I’m feeling a bit chaotic myself at the moment lol
You too hon xx
Creativeness is next to Godliness….I am a firm believer we are created in God’s image and He didn’t just set the stage to see what unfolds, but is constantly involved in our day to day to busy-ness, tweaking and fulfilling His Creation…Happiness is creativeness wrapped in love.
Those are beautiful words, beautiful thoughts. Thank you for the reminder. I needed it. Have a super day, and thank you so much for stopping by.
I shipped my manuscript off to the publisher in December and have had no strong desire to tackle any writing, other than my blog, since then. It’s good to take time off and recharge the batteries. My advice would be to enjoy the break from the keyboard . . .
Hi Simon, yes, it is good to take the time off. I guess I’m feeling the pressure because once the kids are out of school (in 6 weeks) then I won’t have a choice–I have to take time off from writing. I’ll still get my morning block, but there won’t be any downtime to think/daydream about what I’ve written or what I’m going to write next, which always keeps me in the frame of mind for writing until I can get back to it.
I think it makes sense for you to lay low for a while. You’ve got to do a lot of promotions for your book in no time at all, and you need to be in tip-top shape
I know the feeling. This happened to me when I had to work on my dissertation instead of finishing my first novel. Incidentally – the two novels I now have contain a lot of common themes and plot elements. They are even interwoven at one point (I just couldn’t help myself). Will be a nice eater egg for my readers. The loyal followers have to get rewarded at some point, right?
Hey Fredrik, I love knowing that little tidbit about your novels. So, if they’re interwoven at one point, does that mean they have some of the same characters, or they share a setting? I have two story ideas where they wouldn’t be sequels, but I’d have the characters from one show up in another because of a certain storyline.
Yes, I think your loyal followers would indeed deserve to get rewarded. But you have to forgive me–what is ‘nice eater egg’? I don’t know that expression.
Thanks for commenting!
The main character of one novels makes a cameo in the other
Haha, I meant to write Easter egg. Missed the S.
Ah, yes, I understand Easter egg!
Thanks for clarifying, although I’m disappointed. I thought I was about to be educated on some neat Swedish expression 
I enjoyed this post
awesome stuff! x
Thank you so much!
I feel that too. For some reason, not saving a novel or short story on the go makes me feel low. Its much harder to do anything at all when I realise that I’ll not be working with those characters, our in that fantasy land.
Hey Ileandra,
It can be so depressing, can’t it? We are bound to these characters just by our imagination, and sometimes I feel like I have failed them when I can’t bring their stories to life. However, I trust that I will get my energy and vitality back and burn rubber on my next project.
Thanks for commenting.