Author Post-Kourtney Heintz

The Importance of Being on Your Own Side

If you follow my blog, you know I went through an incredibly low point last fall. If you don’t, here’s a quick recap: I had a revise and resubmit with one of the top literary agencies in the world. I thought I’d nailed their requested revisions. I envisioned them opening the door and me walking into their literary world.

It didn’t happen. Actually the opposite happened. Three days after I sent off my revisions, I was told they didn’t like what I did and they soundly rejected my book and me.

It was one of the worst moments of my writing life. Not just because I was so close to my dream and denied, but because it shook me to my foundation.

I lost faith in my writing. I stopped believing in me.

I couldn’t write. It all felt so pointless. So hopeless. Years of work. Of making writing the center of my life and I had nothing to show for it–just a series of almosts that amounted to nothing.

And no matter what fellow writers and friends said to cheer me up, it didn’t penetrate my despair. Because no matter how much they believed in me, I no longer did.

After years of fighting for my writing, I no longer had it in me. Maybe the world was right. Maybe I wasn’t a good writer. Maybe it was time to give up. Go back to auditing. Let this dream die.

But some spark of hope remained inside me. Made me move on to the next project. I bartered with myself. If I finished it and felt no better, I was going to stop writing for a while.

About half way through revisions on that manuscript, I started to care again. I liked it. Really liked it. And wanted to see it do well.

And it hit me–there is a long, long line of people waiting to tear you down or tell you you’re not good enough. But in the end, you truly need one person on your side–you. And then you can quiet the other voices and listen to the feedback and support you are getting from fellow writers and friends.

Everyone needs a team to help them succeed as a writer, but the most important person on your team is you. You have to believe with all your might in yourself. And then anything and everything becomes possible.

Kourtney Heintz

Kourtney Heintz writes emotionally evocative speculative fiction that captures the deepest truths of being human. For her characters, love is a journey never a destination.

She resides in Connecticut with her warrior lapdog, Emerson, her supportive parents and three quirky golden retrievers. Years of working on Wall Street provided the perfect backdrop for her imagination to run amuck at night, imagining a world where out-of-control telepathy and buried secrets collide.

Her debut novel, The Six Train to Wisconsin, was a 2012 Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award Semifinalist.

SixTraintoWisconsin1600

When Kai’s telepathy spirals out of control, her husband Oliver brings her to the quiet Wisconsin hometown he abandoned a decade ago, where he must confront the secrets of his past to save their future. 

You can connect with Kourtney at the following links:

Website: http://kourtneyheintz.com

Blog: http://kourtneyheintz.wordpress.com

Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/kourtneyheintzwriter

Twitter: http://twitter.com/KourHei

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/goodreadscomkourtney_heintz

Amazon Author Central Page: http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B00CJO8DZO

Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/kourhei

Interested in buying her book?

Paperback available from:

Amazon

Barnes and Noble

Ebook available from:

Amazon

Barnes and Noble

Smashwords

Kobo

iTunes

 

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46 thoughts on “Author Post-Kourtney Heintz

  1. Hi again Kourtney, there you go again, popping up all OVER the place 😉

    This is a great post and one which I think everyone can relate to in some way. Those feelings of self-doubt, and all your hopes being dashed. What you say is so true, as much as it’s wonderful to know that lots of people are supporting you, and offering words of encouragement, unless you really believe something yourself then their words can’t change how you feel; it’s rather like telling someone not to worry about something – the intention is good but ultimately it’s rather pointless.

    It’s wonderful that you’ve overcome it, and launched your book, and I’m sure your experience will be an inspiration to others.

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    • Hi Vanessa! 🙂 LOL. Trying my best to be everywhere.

      It was one of those a-ha moments that are so simple but take so long to reach. Thanks. I didn’t see how important my own support was until I lost it. And suddenly everything became impossible. I hope it helps other people to know I’ve been there and I got through it. 🙂

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    • Thanks Victoria! I think it’s important to capture the low moments so you can appreciate the high ones. And to understand how important what you think of yourself is to your success. 🙂

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  2. Excellent post. How can we expect others to love what we do if we don’t love it as well?

    I tossing in a slice of thin crust with basil, roma tomatoes, and fresh morell mushrooms. With all the rain, they are popping up all over.

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  3. Kourtney is everywhere in my blogsphere! …And it’s awesome, because she has such wonderful things to say, about writing, self, and our own happiness as creators. I’m so inspired for myself to read how she stood up to The Man, and more so inspired for her, for coming out stronger than before. 😀

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    • LOL. Hello again Mayumi! 🙂 Glad you’re enjoying the posts. I’m so delighted to be here on Kathryn’s blog today. I think it’s easy to forget all the stuff you go through to get to a good place. I don’t ever want to forget how uncertain this all was for so long. It makes me appreciate what I have everyday. 🙂

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  4. Nice to meet up with you again here, Kourtney. Thanks for sharing your phoenix from the ashes story. I’m glad you found your way back to writing after that painful rejection. I look forward to reading your novel.

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    • Hi again Jagoda! 🙂 Me too. There were times I wasn’t sure where I would end up. Without me on my side, I was lost and floundering for a bit. Luckily, I forced myself to keep writing and found my way back to believing in my work and me. 🙂 Aw thank! I hope you enjoy it!

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    • Thanks Sheila. It took me a couple months to come back to believing in myself. Though it felt like and endless stretch of time when I was in it. I’m incredibly grateful to all the fabulous bloggers talking about their indie experiences. They helped me avoid making so many newbie mistakes. 🙂

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  5. Touching post! Those experiences that crush us, usually make us stronger once we dig out from all the pain. Good luck with your book. I have about a dozen or so books ahead of yours, but I vow to get to it (I love the idea behind it–so intriguing).

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    • I’m glad my story had a good ending. At the time, I never ever imagined I’d be sitting here writing these guest posts for my book launch.

      Thanks Char! I have a to-read list that won’t let me pass on til my 106th birthday. 😉 I feel you on that one.

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    • Hi Scott. Thanks for swinging by. I think believing in oneself is part of the package deal–hard to succeed without it. But for a lot of us, it’s soooo hard to get to that place. That’s probably why Kourtney’s story is extra sweet.

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      • Hi Scott! That’s a great mantra, but always can be a bit hard to swing. From time to time, you can lose belief in yourself when something really bad happens. I think it’s a normal reaction. The trick is realizing what is going on and finding a way to rekindle it. 🙂

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  6. What an inspiring story. I’ve been there and know exactly what this is like,Kourtney. This is one the main reasons I dropped publishing houses and decided to self publish. I’ve never looked back 😀

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    • Thanks for coming by Dianne. I’m sure the moment you made the decision to self-publish is ingrained in your memory because of how important that decision was. Kourtney will probably always remember the moment she decided to self-pub this book, too. We carry big moments around with us forever. 🙂

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      • LOL. I was hesitant and kept thinking maybe I should wait. Until I realized I’d done all the querying I could and this book wasn’t meant for traditional publishing. Once the decision was made, I never doubted it was the right thing. But I spent a few months coming to that decision. 🙂

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    • Dianne that’s awesome! I’m so glad you found your sweet spot in publishing. 🙂 And it’s great to meet a fellow author who battled her way through that and came out better for it. 🙂

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  7. I’m glad to have been one of those blog buddies who encouraged you to keep going! Sometimes we know ourselves best, but other times, we’re “too close” and others have a clearer view—even if we don’t believe it at the time. 😉 So most of all, I’m glad you rediscovered your self-confidence and belief in your abilities because you are a truly talented writer. And because I and others are learning so much from your journey, so thank you for sharing it with us!

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    • Hey JM,

      We have some of the best seats for watching Kourtney’s journey, don’t we? 🙂 I’m glad Kourtney rediscovered her self-confidence and self-belief, too.

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    • Me too JM! It’s easy to let the negativity and the rejection take over and get lost in my own head. You and my blog buddies kept me reading your blogs and showing up to my own, you were my ties to writing when I wanted to walk away from writing. Thank you for holding me steady. 🙂

      Thanks. That’s so wonderful to hear! I’m glad to be sharing our writer journeys. Because no matter if we’re pre-pubbed or pubbed, we’re both going through similar writer ups and downs.

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      • Thank you Coleen! 🙂

        And thank you Kathryn for letting me take over your blog and helping spread the word about my book! 🙂 Aw, I’ve made a good number of first timer fumbles. I hope my posts help you avoid them. 😉

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  8. Kourtney,

    I want to thank you so much for being a guest author on my blog. I love the support that I see for you across blogosphere, and it’s no different here.

    Your message in this post is perfect for all writers, both struggling and established. I think we all have to find that source of self-belief and never let go, because that really is what carries us through our careers. Self-belief will encourage us to keep going through the difficult times, to want to learn and improve and grow, and to continue on our journeys.Self-belief makes it possible to fight for our dreams.

    Awesome post!!

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    • Kathryn,

      Thank you! I really wanted to create a post that fit your blog’s themes and would slide in nicely. So glad you liked it!

      Terrific support here and across the blogosphere–makes me realize how many amazing people I have in my online world. 🙂

      Self doubt can paralyze us and decimate our confidence. Self-belief is so important but when you have professionals in the industry telling you something, it’s really tough not to internalize their words. That’s when we need to remember that long line of naysayers and join the line of people who think we can. 😉

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      • Support is huge. I didn’t think I ever “needed” writing friends, after all, a writer is a loner! But after I began my blogging journey and met so many wonderful people–all of whom are experiencing similar path twists, I realized how important it is to have a support system. People who “get” what I’m going through.

        That’s why your upswing has rung loud and clear in this little corner of our blogosphere. 🙂

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  9. This post has inspired me believe it or not. I am a novice writer and so I give you kudos for even trying to have your manuscript published. It’s a dog eat dog world out there, and so the competition is fierce. From what I know of publishers is that it’s not only about if you are a good writer but how commercial your writing is. If they can’t market you in what they see to be a money making machine, it may influence them not to take you on as a client. I know I’m in for a rough ride because I need help with editing my Novel, and once I get that done I plan to try my hand at query letters to publishing agencies. My gut feeling tells me to stay small and find indie publishers or go the self-publishing or e-publishing route, nowadays with the Internet you can be your own publishing house. Food for thought. Don’t give up on something you believe in.

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  10. It is a very tough industry to be a part of. You have to spend a lot of time working on your craft, networking with fellow writers and understanding how things work. I think great writing will be recognized. But it can take a long time. It’s awesome that there are opportunities to indie and self publish after a couple years of writing and revising and really perfecting your manuscript. Just so you are putting the absolute best book you can out there!

    Like

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